Weddings are scary.

Many of you haven’t done it before and with all the luck in the world won’t need to again so its a one off event!

There is so much to think of and need to do if you have questions or need advise if I can help I will but remember my expertise are in the stationery part, invitations, menus, order of service (this is always a big debating issue), table plans, name cards, bridal boxes, favour boxes, if you can think of it and its stationery, I can make it.

Invitations

Oh so many questions….the biggest…when should they be sent out? Well there is so much controversy on this one. I think in this day and age it should be when best suits you, and the most common sense decision. Foe example, if you are getting married in the middle of holiday season or over christmas, it would be a good idea to get them out early or at least send out save the dates so no one books any holiday or family functions over your chosen dates, also the same if people need to make travel arrangements, such as wedding abroad or where your relatives are all coming from abroad to attend. I would say just as soon as you can get them done, do it! No panic then.

If you are marrying at any other time of year then the ball is in your court. Some small weddings, most of the guest already know and the invitation is just a formality, then there is no rush, unless you want it to be. Many companies say 3 months before the wedding others say 4 weeks. I would suggest somewhere in the middle if you really need a guide, you need time for the guests to send back rsvps. remember all families have those who don’t send theirs back so you will need some chasing time to call them and find out for sure. This obviously needs to be set at least a couple of weeks before your meeting with venues or caterers so you can give them exact numbers.

I think the best rule of thumb would be to just get a list together for numbers and find some invites you like and just have them made as soon as you are ready. Even if they sit in your lounge for a month they will be there and ready when you are. Any good stationer will happily make you a few more if you need them at a later date but its best to order between 5 and 10 more than you think you need. There’s always a few surprises.

Menus

These can’t be done till you have met with your venue or caterer and they do this much closer to your date. Give them a ring and ask them when it maybe if they haven’t already told you as they will be able to give you a rough idea. Each venue/company works to different timescales so its always best to ask.

Order of Service

This is a massive area for questions…when do I sort it out, what should it look like, what goes in it, whats the difference between a church order of service and a civil order of service……..

Ok, firstly, don’t panic, these get sorted out in due course when you do your meeting with your minister or when you have the meeting with your civil ceremony lead. You will go through what hymns you want, readings you would like and general order in which the service will be held. This all the Order is. A list for your guests to know what order its all in and what comes next.

Most Christian weddings have between 2 and 4 hymns, there is no set rule. Your minister will often have his/her own ideas and its best to follow these it will make life easier and they can be very helpful. If you speak with them in the meeting and say you have an order of service to put together they will often give you a printed sheet of how they conduct their wedding ceremonies and then you just insert your hymns or readings where you require them. This list is what your stationer will need and they can do the rest for you with a few questions here and there they should be able to take most of the weight of this off your shoulders.

They often work something like:

Order of Service

The Procession: (your chosen entrance music)

Introduction

Reading: (often accompanied by the name of those reading and name of the piece to be read)

Hymn: (your first hymn)

The Marriage

The Lesson and Reading

Hymn: (your second hymn)

The Prayers

The Blessing

The Signing of the Register (sometimes you will have a certain piece of music playing here)

The Recession (your chosen exit music)

You should always gain copyright permission before printing out the full wording of any hymns. Your minister can advise you whether his church holds a CCL (Church Copyright Licence) which means you would not need to seek out these copyright permissions as they are already allowed. It is not to sing a hymn where you need this but to print out the words of one.

Copyright exists in creative works such as hymns for 70 years after the death of the writer. During that period, it is illegal to reproduce the works in any form without the permission of the copyright holder (or their appointed agent). Best idea is to pick older hymns if you can, again ask your minister for advice, they will know best on this subject.

Order of the Day

This is for those not having a church wedding and wish to still have some sort of order so guests know what is coming in the same way an order of service works. However they usually cover the whole day and often read something like this

12pm Arrival of the Guests

12.30pm Entrance of the Bride (followed by the chosen music to be played for example)

Reading (followed by name of piece and  person reading)

Wedding Vows

Signing of the Register

Reading (followed by name of piece and person reading)

Exit of the Bride and Groom

1.30pm Champagne on the Terrace (or whatever you have planned directly after the ceremony)while Photographs are being taken in the Garden

2.30pm Wedding Breakfast

4.30pm Cutting of the cake and speeches

6pm A walk through the garden to the Club for the evening reception, evening guests will begin to arrive at 7pm

8.30pm Buffet

12pm Carriages

Obviously with an order of the day, so many different scenarios can happen that this really is just a guide, there maybe travelling to be done etc but this can all be added in the order.

Table Plans

The last of the main questions…when do you do this?   That really is the ultimate question as it doesn’t matter how organised you are, there is always one who lets you down or falls out with the others on their table a few days before the big day. And its always a task to work out who should and often shouldn’t sit next to each other. I am not sure how other companies deal with these as we have found there are always changes right near the day. What we suggest is get us a rough draft as soon as you can, at least 3 weeks before your day. We do a mock up as all our table plans are custom made and then in the meantime of changing the design to suit your via sending emails and photos etc you should then finalise your plan. We tend to leave these to the last week before we send them out as of the very reason discussed earlier. The changes that do and probably will occur.